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Instructions how to withdraw money from cash machine

 
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Emmy
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Joined: 30 Jun 2006
Posts: 2460
Location: Scotland

PostPosted: Tue Nov 02, 2010 3:54 pm    Post subject: Instructions how to withdraw money from cash machine Reply with quote

MALE and FEMALE
AT THE ATM MACHINE

A new sign in the Bank reads:

'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling
customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined
below when accessing their accounts.

After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed.
Please follow the Appropriate steps for your gender.'

**! ********* ********************
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.

*******************************
FEMALE PROCEDURE:
What is really funny is that most of this part is the Truth.!!!!
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set handbrake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on mobile phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance
from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check make-up in rear view mirror
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Place receipt in back of card wallet.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on the mobile phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release handbrake.

THIS CAN BE SENT TO A MAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH, AND TO THE LADIES YOU THINK CAN
HANDLE IT!

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Gil
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Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 1532
Location: Connecticut, USA

PostPosted: Thu Nov 04, 2010 7:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Funnnnny!!!!

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Gil
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goganga
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Joined: 27 Jun 2006
Posts: 3172
Location: Northern Italy

PostPosted: Sat Nov 06, 2010 2:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ahahah! That's funny!!!

That reminds me an embarrassing episode...
I was driving a friend's car in the highway. At the end of the run, I had to pay the fee... It was a windy night.. I took the ticket and tried to give it to the cashier to pay... But the ticket flew away because of the wind.. So I opened the car door to catch it but the car was too close to the cash box and I could not go out... So my friend opened his car door and run to catch the ticket. When he came back, he was laughing and told the cashier: "Nothing to be surprised about... she's just a woman" Embarassed Embarassed Embarassed

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Di troppe cose non so cosa farne, per me che avrei bisogno di poche immagini ma eterne. (G. Gaber)
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Gil
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Location: Connecticut, USA

PostPosted: Sun Nov 07, 2010 7:21 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Still friends? Dancing

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Gil
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goganga
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Location: Northern Italy

PostPosted: Sun Nov 07, 2010 4:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ahaha! Yes, we're still friends!!!!! Mr. Green

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how I long to see the sun in a sky of perfect blue,
with the sunlight on my face, but there's nothing I can do...
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Di troppe cose non so cosa farne, per me che avrei bisogno di poche immagini ma eterne. (G. Gaber)
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Emmy
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Location: Scotland

PostPosted: Mon Nov 08, 2010 4:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Guess we're all tarred with the same brush Simy Dancing Dancing

When my daughter was paying to get on the motorway in France she had to get out of the car too to get the ticket good job she was able to get out and back into the car again because there would have been no way I would have got out the other door to go round to get it.

Emmy

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